Which Type of Funeral Should I Choose?

“So when did your auntie die?” The funeral director gently asked us 30 minutes past her mortuary’s closing time. I had to hide my embarrassment by explaining nobody had died…yet. But Mom made us race there because she was planning a head for her sister, who had a stroke that day. Mom had a budget in mind and was well prepared to pay for my aunt’s impending funeral. In our case, my aunt’s funeral was planned days before she actually passed. The funeral director was a little surprised, but the hard stuff was taken care of.

My situation seems laughable because my mom is so pragmatic, but most people are unable to think objectively or even critically after experiencing a tragic event.  Neurologist Lisa Shulman, MD, discusses trauma such as grief and the impact it has on the brain. This can be the worst time to plan such an important and costly event like funeral planning. So maybe it’s a discussion to have or a topic to consider before tragedy hits.

Top Five Questions to Consider When Planning a Funeral

There are so many factors determining final arrangements and so many types of funerals. Respecting your or your loved one's wishes for their body is essential. It really requires a balance that accounts for honoring your loved one, acknowledging emotional needs and accepting financial realities. Here are the top five most common questions to consider in planning a funeral.

‍1. Did they have specific plans?

‍‍One of the easiest ways to plan a funeral is if your loved one has already made arrangements. Did they have a prepaid funeral plan or set aside funds specifically for this purpose? Some individuals work with a funeral home in advance, ensuring their wishes are clear and expenses are covered.

They may have also expressed preferences for their service—whether they wanted a traditional burial, cremation, or something else entirely. Details like location, music, or religious elements may have been discussed ahead of time.

Some, like my pragmatic mother, take it a step further by outlining their wishes in a living trust or establishing a funeral trust . This helps prevent financial strain, family disputes, or confusion during probate.

If a plan exists, reviewing it early can make the process smoother and ensure their final wishes are honored.

2. Are There Cultural or Religious Funeral Traditions to Follow?

‍‍Cultural and religious traditions  play a significant role in funeral planning. Many faiths have specific guidelines regarding:

• Burial or cremation – Some religions strongly prefer one over the other.
• Timing of the funeral – Certain traditions require burial or cremation within a specific timeframe.
• Viewings and wakes – Some customs encourage public visitations, while others do not.
• Embalming – Some religions prohibit embalming, while others allow or require it.
• Religious officiants – Clergy, monks, or other spiritual leaders may need to be present to perform rituals or prayers.

Religious funerals often serve a dual purpose—to guide the deceased into the afterlife and to bring comfort to the grieving. Understanding these traditions ensures that final arrangements honor both spiritual beliefs and family customs.

3. What’s the Environmental Impact of Different Funeral Options?

If you’re looking for a more eco-friendly funeral option, it’s important to consider the environmental impact of traditional burial and cremation.‍

• Traditional Burial  – Each year, U.S. cemeteries use:
  
  • 30 million board feet of hardwood for caskets
  • 90,000 tons of steel for vaults and caskets
  • 1.6 million tons of reinforced concrete for burial vaults
• Cremation – While it eliminates land use concerns, cremation releases an estimated 360,000 metric tons of CO₂ annually in the U.S., contributing to greenhouse gas emissions.

For those looking for sustainable alternatives, consider:

• Water Cremation (Alkaline Hydrolysis) – Uses water and an alkaline solution instead of fire, producing fewer emissions and requiring less energy.
• Green Burials – Avoid embalming, use biodegradable caskets or shrouds, and allow natural decomposition without harmful chemicals.‍
• Terramation (Human Composting) – Converts the body into nutrient-rich soil, providing a natural and regenerative way to return to the earth.

As eco-conscious funeral options become more available, individuals can choose a method that aligns with their values while reducing their environmental footprint.

4. Funeral Costs: Burial, Cremation & Affordable Alternatives?

Money and death are probably the two most dreaded topics to discuss—but planning ahead can help reduce financial stress when the time comes. Funeral expenses vary widely depending on the type of service, location, and personal preferences.‍‍

Key Factors That Affect Funeral Costs

• Service Type: Traditional funerals with viewings and ceremonies tend to be more expensive than direct cremations.
• Burial vs. Cremation: Burial costs are typically higher due to expenses like caskets, grave plots, and headstones.
• Eco-Friendly Options: Green burials and water cremations may be more affordable but have limited availability in some areas.
• Personalization: Memorial services, urn selections, and special tributes can add to overall expenses.

So, how can you plan for a funeral without overspending? Below is a breakdown of the most common funeral options and their average costs.

5. How Can You Memorialize a Loved One?

Honoring a loved one's memory can be deeply personal. Whether you choose a traditional burial, cremation, or an alternative memorial, there are many ways to create a lasting tribute.

• Gravesite Memorials – A traditional burial site may include a plaque, headstone, or monument as a permanent place of remembrance.
• Urns & Keepsakes – Cremated remains can be kept in an urn, placed in a columbarium, or incorporated into memorial jewelry or art.
• Memorial Trees – Planting a tree in their honor creates a living tribute that grows for generations.
• Memorial Benches – Placing a bench in a garden, park, or special location provides a peaceful space for reflection.
• Scattering Ceremonies – Ashes can be scattered in a meaningful place, but keep in mind that permits may be required for locations like national parks or open waters.
• Eulogies & Tribute Speeches – Sharing stories and memories at a funeral or memorial service allows loved ones to celebrate their life.‍
• Charitable Donations – Contributing to a cause or nonprofit organization they cared about can be a meaningful way to honor their legacy.‍
• Digital Memorials – Online tribute pages allow family and friends to share photos, videos, and memories, keeping their spirit alive forever.

No matter which option you choose, a thoughtful memorial can bring comfort to those grieving while ensuring your loved one's memory lives on.

It’s a lot. I know.

Processing through all the decisions is overwhelming. Having a platform like Hello I'm Dead can allow you to take control of probably the most important celebration of your loved one’s life. They’re there to help you navigate the options to create an end of life tribute that your loved one will be grateful for and you can be proud of.  Need help with Funeral Planning? Get a Personalized Consultation Today.

*Additional Resources from Funeral Cost Comparison Chart:‍

TraditionalBurial & Funeral

Cremation &Funeral

‍Water Cremation (Alkaline Hydrolysis)‍

Green Burial‍

Terramation (Human Composting)